Well, it's been about a year since my last blog and I'm bored/lazy so why not? I just read my blog, which I haven't seen for about a year and I came across this post.

Tuesday March 15, 2005
Today, my friends and I were supposed to sign a lease for next year. We're quite lazy. A 4 bedroom, 3 bathroom with sweet, sweet LAN internet. Next year is gonna be much better than this year. My current Apt is so gross. I get all the stale chips that we can't sell anymore from work, many of them are Rollitos ( nasty little rolled Doritos ). Rollitos are so gross that no one will eat them. So we fight with them. Rollitos everywhere. My roomates put locks on their doors so I wouldn't Rollito their rooms when I get drunk. Is that weird? But my Apartment next year is gonna B sweet. I'm gonna get a giant business-like desk and put it in my room. I'll probably place it right in front of the door so it's the first thing you see when you enter. I'll have to buy chairs for the other side of the desk for lowlifes to sit at when they come to talk to me.

Ha, it's funny cause I did move into a sweet new apartment, but we've trashed it so bad since we had moved in that it looks just about as bad as the old apartment we lived in. I also bought my executive desk. I like it alot. My room is now my office and my closet is now my room. Girls are pretty much weirded out when I bring them back to a closet/room. But I still think it's funny.

Ive Got Baked Goods On My Head But Don't Call Me A Baked Goods Head

daa daa daaaa, daa da da, daa da da!

Yes bitches! It's almost time for Star Wars.
(if you couldn't tell that already from the title.)
I'm not the biggest Star Wars fan, in fact, I
don't even think the new movies are all that
good. And the one thing that pisses me off
more than anything is the damn Star Wars
displays that I have to put up for Frito. You
bunch of Star Wars, fat ass, chip lovers!

In many cities you can purchase the 12:00
midnight tickets for the opening of Star Wars.
There is nothing better than Star Wars
freaks. Jamming hundreds off geeks
into one theater can be a pretty
ridiculous thing, but jamming hundreds of
Star Wars fanatics into the first showing of
the new movie is absoultly ridiculous. These
people are nuts.

I went to the 12 o-clock showing of Star Wars
four years ago. I think I had just turned 16.
I was expecting to see the movie and that's it.
My friends and I sat down as the theater was
starting to fill. It was filled by about 11:15. The
next forty-five minutes were absolutly crazy.
Some people brought beach balls which they
volleyed around the packed croud, some were
dancing, and other were crowd surfing.

Many people dressed up as movie characters,
while others dressed in their Star Wars logoed
shirts and other merchandise.

So, needless to say, my friends and I are all
planning to do it again. This time I'm going to
be dressed as the biggest, gayest Star Wars
fan ever. I also plan on becoming influenced by
my very good friend alcohol, before the movie.
This will assure that I won't just be dressed as
the biggest, gayest Star Wars fan ever. I
will also be acting like the biggest, gayest fan
ever.

A Tribute to the Animals of My Past

Colin's gecko died the other day,
Well, I guess he was put down.

It made me think.
Little Cotton was a good gecko.
Church decided to freeze him.
Unfortunatly, he decided to do it
in my freezer... in a see-thru container.

I go to get icecubes one morning
and I see Cotton's exothermic ass frozen
solid in my goddamn freezer.

It made me think.
In my life I've gone thru many pets.
So now, for your reading pleasure,
I'm going to remember all of them and tell
a little about them.
Past to Present

Mindy - My dad's dog. I don't remember
her much, but I do remember that when she
would wipe her ass on the carpet.
I called it the boot-scoot-boogie.

Gordon- A goldfish bought for me at the
grocery store, $.50 I think, well, I'm not to
sure how much it was because I was no older
then 4. I really enjoyed having Gordon around
for the car ride home from the grocery store.
But unlike Mindy, you just can't play with a
fish the same way you can play with a dog.
Gordon never made it home from the grocery
store. But he apparently was a really talented
fish, right before my mom told me he was dead,
I taught him to swim upside down.
I buried Gordon in the back yard.
I cried and cried.

Sam- probably one of the horniest dogs ever.
I never liked playing with him because
his red rocket was constantly out.

Misty- my favorite animal, even though
she was a cat. I had her for roughly 15 years.
My mom decided to move
to a house out in the woods and I left for college,
so she took the cat. She let it go out in
woods one night and Misty would never return.

Eek and Oblina- 2 ferrets, fun to play with,
but they stunk like ungodly hell. It was fun
to let them out of the cage so they could run around
the house like wild beasts, terrorizing the dog.

Rocky- My one and only hamster. He would absolutly
bite everyone but me. I have know idea why. But for me,
he was very cool. My sister decided it would be cool
for her hamster (which later got it's name changed to
'Fangs') to meet my hamster. Apparenty Rocky decided
to get his freak on with 'Fangs' and Fangs tore him apart.
Cleaning the shreads and remains of Rocky was rather
depressing.

Bernard- My first bird. He wasn't much fun. I lost
interest rather fast. I went on a trip one week, came
back and relized Bernard had ended his life by drowning
himself in the bathtub I had bought for him.

Tom- Tom was very odd looking, he was a sugar
glider. Sugar gliders are a cross between a squirrel
and a chipmunk. Tom had a bad case of social
anixety. Every time I would go to feed him he would run
away in distress. I gave him away because he stunk
horribly and he did this very odd sounding (loud)
mating called at night.

Casey- I thought dogs were supposed to be fun.
Casey is still alive today, and he live with my mom.
I hate him very much. He won't play, he won't do
anything. He lives in a depressed state of mind. The
only thing he will go absolutely beszerk for is my mom.
That pisses me off. Every once in a while I will spread
trash from the trash can all over the living room floor.
I'll even let him watch me. Then when my mom gets
home from work I'll just sit there and watch my mom
yell at him.

MTV's Hip-Hop

I'm not much of a hip-hopster. In fact, I think I might hate hip-hop. But I do watch a lot of MTV. Unfortunatly, MTV loves hip-hop... So I was watching MTV today and a sweet hip-hop video came on. It was Fat Joe and J Lo. The music blew, but for some reason I keep watching. The whole time I just wondered. How did this duo come about. Was Fat Joe just sitting around one day eating a whole bucket of chicken and decided he was going to call up one of the hottest girls in entertainment. It's still a mystery to me. But that wasn't even what was bothering me. What I wanted to know was with all these hip-hop duets (I'm sure that real gangsters don't use the word duet but that's the only word I can think of) like Ja Rule, Ludacris, and Fat Joe working with extemlely attractive female artists, do these guys ever try to hook up with the girls. I mean Jay Z all the sudden was dating Beyonce after their video debut. So did Fat Joe holler at J Lo. Ha. He probably did. I know she's married and all but Fat Joe probably thinks he and his hip-hop carrer are the absolute shit, ya he's a catch. It would be funny to watch Fat Joe trying to hook up with J Lo. I hope they do hook up and have a kid. It will be a fat mexican salsa dancer named Joe Lo.

Tigers will beat your ass.

Well, it's almost here.
The long awaited season starts on monday.
Tigers are stocked this year.
Sport Illustrated is retarded.
They ranked detroit so low.
They don't know shit.
Look how sweet their NCAA board went.
A bunch of biased retards.
Another thing I hate is ESPN announcers.
We played the Yankees yesturday. (beat em)
But the only thing the announcers could talk
about was how the Yankees were
gonna win the world series.
It was as if they couldn't wait for the game to
get over so they could run out onto the field
and jerk off Derek Jeter.

St. Patty's Ain't For this Motha

Everybodies partying quiet hard today.
My job bloooowws. I gotta work at 5 in
the morning.
So I think I'm going to go to bed, wake up
at 4, PARTY for for a hot second, then goto
work all crunked. Then tomarrow when I get
out of work we will be 'keggin it up'.

I went to Staples today.
Went for a highlighter.
I ended up looking at desks.
An employee helped me.
He couldn't understand why
a 19 year college student
needed an executive desk.
I told him I had lots of
important shit to do.
I think he kinda believed me.
but he was still very curious.
He kept asking me where I
was getting money to pay for
the desk.
I told him about my super
important top secret shit I
have to do at Frito.
That, I'm sure he didn't believe.
Then he started making some
remarks suggesting that I was
a drug dealer.
It was amusing.